Why They Lie – The Psychology Behind Deflection and Projection
Oct 17, 2025
When someone lies about you, twists a story, or paints you as the problem in order to protect themselves—it often leaves you reeling.
Why would someone you once trusted do this?
The answer lies not in logic, but in emotional defence patterns. When a person feels their own image, status, or sense of self is threatened, they often engage in unconscious self-protection tactics—at the cost of your truth.
Let’s explore what’s really going on beneath the surface.
1. Deflection: Shifting the Spotlight
Deflection is a common psychological strategy used to avoid accountability. Instead of looking inward, a person shifts attention outward—onto someone else.
They say things like: “She’s just overreacting.” “You can’t trust her version of the story.” “I didn’t do anything—she just flipped out.”
Deflection offers momentary relief for them—but long-term damage for you.
2. Projection: Placing Their Shadows on You
Projection happens when someone takes qualities they dislike in themselves—such as guilt, dishonesty, manipulation, or fear—and unconsciously attributes them to others.
They accuse you of being what they are afraid to admit they’ve become.
3. Image Control and Shame Avoidance
At the core of all this is a deep fear: “If people see who I really am, I’ll lose everything.” So they weave narratives to protect their image—sometimes without fully realizing the harm they’re doing. And sometimes… with full awareness.
4. The Cost of Their Protection is Your Reputation
When someone chooses to protect themselves by attacking your character, the cost is heavy. You question your truth. You feel isolated or unjustly judged. You may start doubting your own memory or actions.
And that’s where the real emotional imbalance begins—not because of who you are, but because your emotional centre has been pulled out of alignment.
5. Reclaiming Your Energetic Stability
You cannot control their narrative. But you can reclaim your inner foundation.
By learning how to reconnect with your emotional core—your Yin, Yang, and Midline—you regain the clarity they tried to strip away.
Start Here: Download your free guide: Unlock the Secrets of Yin, Yang & the Midline – The Three Core Beams Behind Lasting Emotional Balance.
